When It All Turns Bad
by JustSomeFandomGirl
Summary: Natasha makes a bad name for herself on the search for her friend Bucky. Who will she turn to for help when she's the bad guy? Rated T just incase.
1. The Beginning

**I forgot to do it for the last two updates but I don't own Marvel or any of their character.**

May 2000

"Plie, Plie. Beautiful technique, Natalia!"

I tried to hold back a smile as the ballet teacher had applauded my technique.

Alexei had suggested that I take up hobbies considered 'normal' for me to participate in alongside the Soviet, so I decided to take ballet and tennis classes under the name 'Natalia Romanova'. I was familiar with ballet, it was a regular subject back at Red Room Academy, only the instructors there were much more brutal compared to Madame Abramov who constantly spoke with a calm voice. I had been at this ballet school for almost 6 months and not once had I heard her raise her voice.

The two-hour lesson had drawn to an end when the clock struck 7 pm but I stayed because Madame Abramov wanted to speak with me.

"I think it would be an amazing opportunity for you! You have so much talent."

She had wanted to enter me into a competition.

I kindly turned down the offer, I wasn't too sure how Alexei would react to it, and I didn't want to make a second name for myself. One was just about enough.

I pushed past the wooden arch door to get my bag from my locker, everyone else had left.  
I threw my bag onto my shoulder, rummaging through it to find my Motorola RAZR phone to check for any texts until I became aware of somebody else's presence in the room.

"You do know it was only a suggestion when Alexei said you could do 'normal' activities, right?"

I turned sharply on one foot, a wave of relief hit me.

"It gets me out."

"If you wanted to get out all you had to do was ask me, Nat, I'm sure there's a film on we could have watched down the road."

A flirty smile flashed across Bucky's face. I rolled my eyes in return.  
It was difficult to put a label on the two of us, it was obvious that he wanted something more, but I couldn't, love was nothing but a weapon, and to some, it was nothing more but a simple children's game, and I don't play games. But I did enjoy it at night when he would come into my room and tell me stories of his past when he couldn't sleep, he was very passionate about telling them and it was sweet because his eyes would light up in a certain way.

I began walking towards the door, Bucky moved to the side, so I could pass. The sound of his footsteps followed behind me as we exited the brick coloured building.

* * *

I buckled up my seat belt.

"Alexei has a mission for us."

I looked up at Bucky as he reversed out of the parking space and began driving forward with the ongoing traffic. This would be my first mission with Bucky, I normally went alone.

"A couple of years back somebody stole something of great importance to Alexei."

"Who" my voice interjected.

"Unknown."

As the car came to a stop behind a traffic light Bucky handed me a file.

"Alexei has been getting signals on his radar very similar to the tesseract, he wants us to go and look."

"We don't know who has the tesseract- "

"But we know where to look. We just shoot at everyone who shoots at us, it's not that difficult, Nat." His voice was stern.

I continued reading the file as Bucky focused on driving back to the base. Serbia. Alexei wants me and Bucky to travel to Serbia for a blue cube.

"Apparently it holds unimaginable power, it comes from God's. Supposedly." It was almost as if Bucky had read my mind, sometimes I really think he can.

I glanced up at him, he was clearly in as much disbelief as I was, but a mission was a mission, no matter how strange it was.

"When does he want us to leave?"

"ASAP. Alexei has arranged for us to be taken to Serbia in the morning. So, no stories tonight because you need to sleep."

* * *

Bucky turned the engine off as we came to a stop outside the base, I let out a small sigh as I snapped the case file shut.

"I hope you're ready to see the real me."

"I already have."

His voice was gentle, fighting at the walls that I refused to let down.

* * *

We left the camp before the sun even had a chance to rise

"Bring the tesseract home!"

were Alexei's last words to us as we boarded the aircraft. The engine roared as it took off into the sky.

The quickest time possible to get to Serbia was just short of three hours so there was a lot of anxious waiting around, but Bucky took this as an opportunity to begin telling me about his journeys with Steve Rogers. His eyes softened when he began talking.

"He saved almost 400 hostages from Hydra, Including me."

"He sounds like a good man"

"Yeah..." He smiled to himself, deep in thought, most likely thinking about this Steve guy.

"Anyway, how do we plan to get into this base? We can't just stroll in and expect them to hand the cube over."

Bucky stood up from his ragged seat and walked over to a small cabinet towards the exit of the plane. He opened one of the drawers and began to take out a selection of ammo and weaponry.

"We make them fear us."

His words came out dull, making it sound as though it was the easiest thing in the world.

"So, what, we just bomb the place, take what we need and run?"

Bucky smiled innocently before handing me a few grenades.

"That's exactly what we do."

I placed the weapons carefully into my gun belt.

"It's always easier said than done Buck"

"It's just as easy done as it is said when you have one of the worlds best assassins and the Black Widow teamed up."

The aeroplane began to decelerate from the sky into a clearing between some trees

I stood up ensuring that I had everything I needed before opening the plane door.

I gasped sharply as the crisp morning air hit my body beginning to nibble at the tips of my fingers.  
The vibrant colours of orange and yellow in the sky were beginning to peak through the gaps in between the trees as we walked slowly towards the camp in silence.  
Sounds of gunshots tore straight through the peace as Bucky and I ran for cover behind a tree.  
The birds flew from their nests above us in fear.

"The guards are onto us, we need to make this quick." Bucky's voice was a whisper.

"Don't forget the plan. We are onto them." I reached into my gun belt for one of the grenades Bucky had handed me earlier, moving to take cover behind a tree closer to the base.

The base was hidden in very clear view, the odd passer-by would most likely just assume that the worn-down building was nothing more than a secured house.

The gunshots had since stopped so I took this as my chance to cause havoc. I pulled the small pin out of the bomb and tossed it towards the base. An eruption of orange flames exploded from the shell.

I waited for the fire to calm down before sprinting towards the entrance. Occasionally checking behind me to make sure Bucky was close behind.  
I stood in front of what was left of the wooden door, turning around once more to look at Bucky as he stepped over the dead bodies from the explosion.

I pulled my pistol out of my belt, holding my finger on the trigger as I anxiously pushed open the door, unsure as to what would be behind it, I expected the door to be surrounded with loaded guns pointed directly at me and Bucky but there was nothing but an abandoned corridor. This made me very suspicious.

"Strange." Bucky voice filled the desolated hallways.

"Sh!" I hissed back.

"Yeah, because the explosion wasn't loud enough." He rolled his eyes

I ignored his snarky comment and began to progress further down the dusty corridors, except for the few dead bodies outside there wasn't a single trace of life. All the doors inside were left open. My mind was haunted by all the possible outcomes of this mission. It felt like a setup.

"Stay close, Buck."

The further we trod into the building the louder my pulse became in my ears.  
I gripped my pistol tighter towards my chest, my two index fingers stuck to the trigger as we climbed the stairs. Instead of armed people, there were just more open doors which lead to empty rooms. My suspicion of this being a setup grew bigger and bigger with each creak of a floorboard under my feet.

"There!" Bucky's voice whispered as he rushed forward towards the only shut door in the hallway.

There was a bright blue light peaking through the gap under the door. He put his gun back into his belt and placed his hand on the door handle, about to push the door open.

"Bucky…"

He looked back at me before letting out a sigh as he realised his mistake. He pulled his gun out, holding it close similar to how I was holding mine before pushing the door open. I followed his lead as we walked through the door, squinting my eyes the closer I stepped to the tesseract. The blinding blue light radiated off from it illuminating the room.

I picked the cube up into my hands and dropped it almost instantly onto the floor.

I bit back a scream, squeezing my hands in a failed attempt at pain relief as they burnt red.

"Careful, Nat, are you okay?"

Bucky reached down to pick up the lethal cube, not even flinching when he held it in his hand.

"How are you doing that?"

he shrugged before placing the cube into his belt.

It shouldn't have been that easy.

I was proven right as an arm squeezed tight around my waist and a gun was held against my temple.

"It was very brave of the two of you to show up here, it's a shame, really. I hoped I wouldn't have to kill anyone, not today at least, but here we are. Hand it over." The man's voice demanded.

"Okay, okay." Bucky reached into the belt for the tesseract and hesitantly began to hand it over.

The grip around my waist was released so I grabbed the wrist of the hand that held the gun towards my head and turned it inwards towards the man as he pulled the trigger. I removed the gun from his lifeless body and shot him a few more times to make sure he was dead.

"We need to get out of here, quick."

I nodded in agreement. Bucky placed the tesseract back into his belt once more.

I hastily moved towards the door, we didn't even make it to the stairs before more armed men ran in our direction. Bucky pulled me into the closest room on our left.

"There's too many of them" His voice was shaky, unsure of what to do next, I shot at the ones in my eyesight, but it wasn't enough to keep them away, as they got closer, their gun aim became more accurate. A bullet shot through Bucky's shoulder. They weren't stopping, and neither was I.  
I continued shooting at the ones I could see, too busy fighting to acknowledge what Bucky was doing.

He began pulling me towards the window, throwing two grenades at the mob in the process.  
He pulled me in towards him, holding me tight against his chest, throwing his body into the window smashing it with our impact as the two bombs exploded creating a thunderous sound.

Shards of glass and rubble surrounded us as we fell to the ground. Bucky's grip tightened on me, shielding me from us much debris as his arms could.

 _Thud_

Bucky rolled away from me, groaning, but now wasn't a time to stop, I stood up and grabbed Bucky's arm, pulling him up next to me.

"We just need to get back to the aeroplane and then you can rest okay Buck?"

I didn't give him time to respond. I pulled him towards the clearing in the trees, running as fast as I could, keeping a tight grip on his arm so we could avoid any more trouble.


	2. The Betrayal (Part 1)

**A/N I wasn't going to update until Wednesday, but I caught a cold even though its almost June and I couldn't sleep so almost 2000 words later here we are.**  
 **I've split the update in half so the second part will most likely be up tonight.  
Please don't hesitate to leave a review, I would appreciate your feedback a lot.**

 **I don't own Marvel or any of the characters.**

* * *

The stolen aircraft landed back at the Soviet. Besides from a few minor injuries everything was okay, not like it would concern Alexei too much because we could look after ourselves, he would just be glad to have the Tesseract back.

We were both greeted by Alexei once we had stepped back onto the dry grains of soil, which crumbled beneath our feet leaving footprints as we walked. The air around us was still warm, it was almost summer. The sky was a mixture of pinks and oranges which reflected perfectly onto the still pond near the base. The sunset was just proof that even the most beautiful of things end in darkness.

Alexei's face was neutral, his hands clutched an open briefcase, presumably for the cube that Bucky had now removed from his belt.

The neutral face had turned into a wide grin when Bucky had placed the tesseract into the cut-out shape that held the cube perfectly into place.

"Thank you! Thank you! Well done!"  
Alexei was a kind man, but everyone had a bad side, we just hadn't seen it. Yet.

Alexei sealed the small briefcase shut before turning abruptly on his heel and walking back into the base.

* * *

Bucky had finished picking out all the glass shards from my hands and face, he even wrapped my hand into some medical bandage, ignoring my protests. I was fully able to do it myself.  
I hadn't flinched once, Bucky tried to hide the fact that this saddened him; he knew I was used to more severe pain from the Red Room.

"Better?" he spoke softly as he cut the loose bandage from the roll, sticking it down into place with the rest of the bandage on my hand

"I could have done it myself. But thank you." My lips curved upwards, I was grateful nonetheless.

He then sat down on my bed, leaning against the undecorated wall, the walls are a dark grey colour, similar to that of a storm cloud.  
My room was practically empty compared to Bucky's, it contained nothing but a single sized bed, which just about fit inside my room, my room also contained a crate as a bedside table.  
Because of my upbringing, I didn't have any objects or photographs to remind me of home and family. I didn't even have a family.  
Bucky, however, had stashes of superhero comics and photos of him and Steve stored safely in his crate. His room was slightly bigger than mine which allowed him more room to walk around.

Bucky had since begun to take care of his own injuries removing all the splinters from his body and wrapping his gunshot wound in bandage tape.

"So, tell me. How did the tesseract burn me but not you?" I spoke slow making sure he heard and understood what I was saying, it was a question he had avoided earlier, and I intended to know why.

"It's quite simple really. You just aren't worthy." He let out a small laugh to himself. I crossed my arms; a small huff escaped my lips. Bucky was avoiding the question once again.  
He let out a small sigh, hesitating.

"You want to know the whole story?"

"I have an input this time?"

Bucky half-heartedly laughed at my light joke, obviously unsure as to whether he should continue or not. So, I took this as my queue to take a seat next to him on the edge of my neatly made bed.

"You can tell me anything Buck, you know I won't judge you."

I hadn't opened up much to Bucky, but not once had he judged me for what I had done, yet at least. I had no place to judge him. He was the closest thing I had to a friend even though the Red Room had tried everything to teach me to trust nobody.  
I didn't fully trust him. But I trusted him enough. That would be enough to make Madame B swoon.  
It started off small as random smiles walking to training, the smiles progressed into us walking to training together which then eventually turned into him barging into my room to talk and tell me stories of his past when he struggled to sleep at night. It was all too innocent, unrealistic. Something the red room could have never trained me for.

Bucky.

He was staring down at his silver arm, anxiously playing with his fingers, tapping the silver digits slowly onto the white sheets.

"I was on a mission with Steve." His voice was quiet, almost incoherent at the mention of his old best friend. He paused. Hesitating once again.

"The world knew him has Captain America. He was always the small kid from Brooklyn to me though."

I shifted in my seat. The comics in Bucky's room were Captain America ones that dated back to as early as the 1940s.  
Am I supposed to believe this story?

"Our last mission together… we were hunting down Arnim Zola, a Swiss Scientist for Hydra, I fell 100 feet from a speeding train."

"Well that was a bit silly wasn't it?" I winked at him in an attempt to lighten the mood

"Joke all you want but I was a hero. The both of us were."

"So, you fell 100 feet, from a moving train, and survived?"

"Well, my arm didn't. I thought that was obvious?"  
A hint of sadness remained in his voice.

"Okay, but how did you manage to pick up the tesseract without burning yourself?"

"I was getting to that part, but you keep interrupting me." His voice was tired as he went back to playing with his fingers, unsure of how to word his explanation.  
The silence didn't last long.

I nudged my elbow into his arm, mostly as reassurance, a kind reminder that he could tell me anything.

Distress alarms began to scream throughout the base followed by multiple gunshots.  
The Soviet base was being attacked.


	3. The Betrayal (Part 2)

An eruption of explosions rumbled through the bland walls of my room in the base. The atmosphere had become tense within seconds after the alarms tore through the peace.

I looked at an alert Bucky who was now standing up, loading up his gun. I rose up from my seat, reaching for my gun on my bedside table which was just a wooden crate where I stored my weapon, this was something Bucky had told me off for regularly because "anybody could shoot me in my sleep."

I took my stand next to Bucky momentarily for a few seconds before he pushed me back down onto the bed.

"Sit this one out, Nat, Please."

His voice was a sharp whisper, almost desperate, begging me to hide it out, I protested with my eyes, pushing myself off the bed and back up onto my feet.

A huff filled the silence between us as I walked over to the closed door, glancing over to Bucky who now had his arms crossed.

"Nat. You aren't suited up. You need to- "

I interjected. "A suit is nothing. I'm trained."

It was courteous how he was so protective of me, but if he wanted to keep me safe he was in the wrong business. He stared at me in defeat, progressing towards me.

"You go left, I'll go straight on. Once you get to the assembly point you stay there and you wait for me okay?"

I nodded.

"Anything else?"

"Yeah. Don't die."

"You know I won't."

I pushed open the archaic wooden door, it revealed nothing but an empty corridor. I slowly stepped through the abandoned corridor keeping my gun close to my fast rising chest and my finger close to the trigger, the sound of war bounced off the walls. Another explosion boomed throughout the building causing the lights above me to flicker. Footsteps echoed shortly after. I stood still. Taking cover behind the damp wall to my right. The footsteps became louder and louder causing my finger to tremble as I held it closer to the trigger on my gun.

Silence.

A bullet shot at the electricity source opposite from me.  
The corridor became dark.

"We have what we want Miss Romanoff."

My breathing became shaky, my hearing became numb for a few moments.  
This person had been waiting for me which meant this whole thing must have been a trap.

My mind became plagued with all of the outcomes of this scenario and every single one of them included Bucky in danger. I couldn't care less if I were to die in this situation but Bucky? That was too much. My eyebrows knitted together in complete confusion, now was the wrong time to lose my focus. I walked around the corner, holding my pistol away from my chest, aiming it directly at the figure in front of me.  
The sound of an aircraft taking off filled the silence.

"You've missed your flight." My voice was croaky as I attempted to hide the nervousness. The fear.

"No miss Romanoff. You are the one who has missed their flight."

My quick reflexes kicked in instantly as the man shot his gun at me. I front flipped over the bullet that camouflaged perfectly into the midnight filled room, flawlessly landing in front of the silhouette who I could now make out the facial features of. I kicked him in the crotch, he dropped his gun, screaming out in agony, then I punched him multiple times until he fell to the ground.

I straddled his body and held my gun to his forehead.

"Why did you come here?"

The man below me remained silent, I took this as him refusing to reply. I didn't have time for this.

One shot

"Heil Hydra."

Two shots.

I ran through the pitch-black corridors turning each corner, shooting everyone I encountered. The dark made it difficult for me to tell the difference between the good and the bad people. The silence screamed loudly as I approached the assembly point. Once I entered the room my eyes immediately began scanning it for Bucky, who was nowhere to be seen. Alexei and 10 other Soviet assassins were in the oversized room discussing the events which had just occurred, discussing the future for the Soviet. That was until Alexei made eye contact with me, strolling over to me casually as if nothing was wrong when everything was wrong.

"They've taken Bucky." Calmness overshadowed his voice which discomforted me. My mouth became dry as I clenched my jaw. My darkest fears were coming true. Maybe if I stayed by Bucky's side this wouldn't have happened.

"You just let them take him?" My voice was angry, holding back screams that needed to be screamed and tears that needed to be cried.  
I was stronger than this.  
Of course, he let those intruders take Bucky.  
Maybe I should have taken that page out of Madame B's book when she told me to trust nobody.  
He looked down to the floor, too ashamed to look at me.

"Where have they taken him?"

He slightly shrugged his shoulders, not even attempting to care.

"I'm sorry Miss Romanoff"

The fucking bastard.

I stormed out of the assembly point and headed back to my room, so I could collect my black rucksack which contained my 'Natalia Romanova' ID, a credit card and a spare uniform. Carelessly walking over the bodies I had killed along the way.

I could find Bucky.  
With or without help.


	4. Moscow

**I don't own any of the marvel characters (Unfortunately)**

* * *

The bright white lights and neon signs filled the dark city sky in Moscow. A ripping pain tore through the soles of my feet due to all the walking I had done in the past two hours.

Bucky had been taken 2 hours ago, I had no idea where he was, or how to find him.

What was I supposed to do?

My sore feet continued to walk me onwards through the city which was full of life so late on in the night. Drunken people stumbled around screaming slurred compliments to other drunken people without a single care in the world. They were happy, even if it was just the alcohol that had made them this way. They were numb to any other emotion. I envied this.

The bright lights slowly turned into dark, lonely alleyways the further I walked through Moscow.

A group of people were sat on some steps outside a shop which had its shutters down.

"Damn baby, you got any plans tonight?"

 _"make them fear you."_ Bucky's voice rang in my mind. If he were here the men would most likely be begging for their lives right now.

But Bucky wasn't here.

I lacked the energy to fight so instead I continued walking down the desolate alleyway, holding on tighter to my rucksack as I neared a building which had a bright flickering sign which read 'motel' above the door, the M and the L were broken so really, the sign read 'ote'. Small droplets of water fell from the window frames above me. The building was dark, the bricks which made up the building looked slimy. It was no castle. The inside was nothing special either, the walls were damp, a fresh coat of mould covered the corners of each interior wall, but it would do for the night.

a miserable man stood behind the check-in desk, he wore a frown which made a perfect horseshoe shape on the bottom half of his face, his eyes wandered south from my eyes and then back up again as a sly grin formed on his face.

 _"Make them fear us"_ Buckys voice began to plague my mind. How do I make them fear me when Bucky was one of the things they feared most? What was so special about Bucky? Why did they take him? And of course, the one question that still hasn't been answered yet: How the fuck could Bucky hold the tesseract without it burning him when I couldn't?

Right now I just needed a plan. A small, simple plan. Something that would get these 'Heil Hydras' people attention.

Heil Hydra… Hydra.

 _"Our last mission together… we were hunting down Arnim Zola, a Swiss Scientist for Hydra"_

Shit.

I needed to do something big. Something destructive.

I needed to make Hydra fear me.

I needed ammo. And a plane ticket to Budapest.

* * *

 **Guess who's going to see infinity war for the 9th time tomorrow  
I went from "I'm going to sue Marvel for that emotional damage" to "Take more of my money so I can watch this film again" very quick.**

 **But please don't hesitate to leave a review. It's all kicking off in the next few chapters, I'm just working on editing the next one now so hopefully, it should be up by the weekend**


	5. Budapest

"I'm sorry, Miss, would you please step aside."

My plan was supposed to be simple, get the ammo, get on the plane, and do something destructive to make Hydra fear me, but instead, my plan was just very flawed. I hadn't thought it through all that much when I went to the ammo shop to buy explosives and ammo for my pistols. So of course when the security man's hands began to roam my body, patting it down to find what had caused the ear-piercing alarms to go off my natural instinct had kicked in as my foot raised high enough to kick the man flying into the cream coloured wall creating a small crack.  
Two other security guards came running towards me straight after that incident to pin me down onto the floor, their walkie-talkies crackled after someone on the other end of the device had announced there were 4 vans in the area who were on their way to the location.

 _'It's the only way'_ I thought to myself, I kept kicking and fighting them off me, their grip becoming weaker, my kicks becoming stronger.

I reached into my coat for my gun and began shooting at the security guards. Petrified screams from innocent people filled the air as the three men lay lifeless onto the ground.

 _'It was the only way'_ the voice in my head this time was more reassuring than demanding.

More security began running my way through the herd of people who knew better to run and save themselves. Stuck on how to get out of this situation I pulled out a grenade and began running towards the terminal to board a plane, once I was a fair distance away I threw the shell behind me and continued to board the plane in a hurry, the loud explosion erupted, flames ran close behind me, pushing me with a strong force sending me forward. Petrified, weak screams followed shortly after.

* * *

On board the jet I made my way to the cockpit and pushed the button on the door which revealed the pilot and his co-pilot, without hesitation I shot the co-pilot dead.

"If you know what's best for you, you will fly me to Budapest."

The gun was slightly shaking in my hands against the man's head as he pressed a few buttons and began taking off.

I shot him in the head anyway.

I walked through the small puddle of red on the floor and pulled the dead pilot out of his seat taking over the control system, teaching myself all the flight buttons, the buttons varied in colour which confused me for a while, so instead, I focused on the writing below them. Once I got the hang of controlling the plane it wasn't too bad. But I couldn't say it was a walk in the park either.

I kept my eyes on the mini sat nav screen next to me, making sure I was still on the right track to Budapest.

The world was beautiful from above, the sky in the horizon was a perfect shade of blue, the clouds were like steam, they moved gently beside me even when the jet had torn through them, separating them into half. It was very peaceful, almost surreal, a scene I shouldn't have gotten attached to because I was approaching Budapest.

The only issue being, I didn't know how to land an aircraft, maybe shooting the pilot was a bad idea, but he was too risky to keep around, he would have had me exposed in moments. I pushed slightly down on the clutch in front of me, oh dear god this was not going to end well at all.

The beautiful architecture in Budapest was beginning to come into plain sight, closer and closer with each second that passed.

I didn't know how to slow down, I didn't know how to stop. All I could do was speed up.

People the size of ants were running in complete fear, grabbing onto children's hands who were only playing football two brief moments ago, buildings that were the size of a pea not so long ago were now bigger than me, my palms began to sweat, unable to comprehend everything that was happening, or even so, everything that was about to happen.  
The oxygen around me began to suffocate me as I neared the perfectly built stone building.  
The silence was numbing, the only two sounds that broke through that silence was the loud thumping in my chest and the screams of innocent people as the aircraft crashed into the building.

Flames surrounded me.

Darkness consumed me.


	6. SHIELD

**This is more of a filler chapter, but it's an update either way. Bigger things are definitely coming in the next few updates, with a few new Avengers making an appearance.**

* * *

I was supposed to be dead, I knew that much. My eyes opened slowly, blinded by the lightness of the room. The walls were painted white, the floor and ceiling again were white. Maybe I was dead, it definitely felt that way, but I would be in hell if I were. I sat up slowly, suddenly aware of the pounding in my head. I definitely wasn't dead, I was trapped; Imprisoned. I looked around at my surroundings, getting a better look and taking it all. There was a security camera in one of the corners and an outline of the door that blended in perfectly with the walls. Besides from the tiny metal bed I was sat on, the room was empty. Maybe I too was in the arms of Hydra now, maybe Bucky was here. The door creaked open, revealing a tall man wearing a black cloak suit, his heavy footsteps became louder as he got closer to me.

"Morning, Miss Romanoff."

"Who are you?"

"I'm Nick Fury, Director of S.H.I.E.L.D. You should consider yourself lucky to be alive. I sent Barton, one of my agents, to kill you, Miss Romanoff. However, he had made a different call and brought you back here instead. He has been working for me for almost 10 years and not once had he failed a mission, not until yesterday that is."

I remained silent. Nick Fury crossed his arms over his chest "Are you crazy?"  
Am I crazy? Perhaps I am crazy, I just wanted to find Bucky, but maybe that was an impossible objective.  
The man began pacing back and forth the room, impatiently.

Stupid seemed like a more fitting word for my actions but I knew there was at least a tiny bit of meaning behind them.

"What encouraged you to do such reckless shit."

"My friend... Bucky... He was taken, by Hydra, I think. I wanted to find him-"

"You think killing security guards and crashing an aeroplane in Budapest, killing almost 200 people would help you find him? You're more stupid than I thought."

I killed almost 200 people. My chest began to rise faster than usual, my palms became clammy as I fidgetted with the bed sheet below me. I suddenly felt as though I hadn't drunk for weeks, my throat became dry, my guilt response had kicked in. 200 people, dead, at the hands of my own. I gulped before speaking, struggling to get my words out.

"they attacked the base in the Soviet and took him. I wanted help finding him but everyone who survived wouldn't, the Red Room had never taught me how to fly a plane... I didn't intend to kill."

"The Red Room?, the Soviet?, You were trained to kill."

"Everything around us has the ability to kill if you give someone a gun they can shoot it whether they're trained or not."

Clearly, he had enough, he turned sharpishly on one foot and walked towards the door.

"That's why idiots shouldn't have guns."

and then my only company had exited the room and it was just me and my destructive thoughts once again.

* * *

 **Please don't hesitate to leave a review, your feedback would be very much appreciated. If you have any ideas or tips you're more than welcome to PM me and if you are enjoying the story then don't forget to put it in your favourites.  
Thank you for reading.**


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